And I Aint' Gonna Never Be

"With all due respect, uh, you demanded more of us. You demanded perfection. Now, I ain't saying that I'm perfect, 'cause I'm not. And I ain't gonna never be. None of us are. But we have won every single game we have played till now. So this team is perfect. We stepped out on that field that way tonight. And, uh, if it's all the same to you, Coach Boone, that's how we want to leave it." - Julius (Remember the Titans)





Perfection is more than a goal, more than a suggestion, it's a commandment. On this earth, I will never become perfect...in fact...right now I am so far from perfect I need binoculars to even see the next road sign. But my weaknesses are somebody's strengths; my shortcomings are somebody's feats; my successes are somebody's failures. So...with all due respect...as a whole, we near perfect. I can help others magnify their strengths and learn from them to strengthen my weaknesses.

So story of the day...well yesterday I guess. So I went and played volleyball with some kids in my ward. Sometimes I'm OK at volleyball...most the time I'm not. Yesterday was one of those average days that about 50% of the time I hit the ball, and 50% of the time I hit the air. I'm not good under pressure. So when the score was getting close, I was getting nervous and my contact with the air was beginning to far out number the times I actually hit the ball. May I add that our team had already won a game...so we were on the winners side and really didn't want to lose. At game point for the opposing team they served the ball...right at me. Probably in their game plan :) The serve was coming at my face, and fast! I did the only thing I knew how to do! I called for my team, and ducked. Luckily they had my back and four players were there and hit the ball and kept us in the game. It was a bonding moment I feel...and one that I will probably never live down! At least I got some laughs though...right?

String Cheese. Lion King. Face Full Of Mud.

"Make life an adventure!" -Marjorie Paye Hinckley

Sometimes life comes with a lot of surprises. Some are good surprises. Some...are not. A recent surprise in my life...a new relationship. I would say it's going well. This my first real relationship, so sometimes there is communication issues. I feel like he's a clingy, but it's good for me. His name? Harold B. Lee Library on BYU's campus :) Basically what I'm getting at is that I spend a lot of time doing school work and sometimes it's overwhelming. It's a blessing really. I have learned to be that much more grateful for the fun times I do have, and I notice the funny things in life more frequently.

Moment 1: This week I went shopping at Macy's. I love string cheese, so of course I had to buy some. I couldn't find it anywhere though! So I finally went and asked an employee; he was in his early 70's, and had obviously been with the Macy's business for some time. It was a pretty busy night, and I didn't want to make a scene, so I just quietly asked him where the string cheese was. "CREAM CHEESE! WE SURE DO CARRY THAT! WE ALSO GOT YOUR PROVOLONE, HAVARTI, PEPPERJACK, MUNSTER, SWISS, SHARP CHED..."

He started to yell out every cheese! Everyone around was staring at us! "No sir," I said, "I just want STRING cheese."

"WELL. I JUST TOLD YOU! WE HAVE ALL KINDS OF CREAM CHEESE ON AISLE 10."

Ok. So he's old and hard of hearing. I just smiled and started to walk away and ran straight into this boy's shopping cart. He started to laugh, my face went red, and I started to apologize. He stopped my apologies and assured me that there was string cheese, along with the cream cheese, on aisle 10.

Moment 2: Lion King. Big screen. 3D!!!!! Lion King has been my favorite movie since the day I arrived on this earth! When I heard it was coming to the big screen in 3D, for two weeks only...I new it was in my destiny to see this movie! The fact that Lion King was going to be on the big screen was a miracle, but the second Zazu flew by my head and we were soaring over the African Savanna...tears may or may not have filled my eyes. Greatest ever!!!!!



























Moment 3: The Dirty Dash. It's exactly what it sounds like!! You get dirty...and you run. It's a 10K race/obstacle course filled with hay bales, rope swings, tunnels, climbing, swimming, and...LOTS of MUD! My team and I all wore cute bright orange fairy wings throughout the race. It was the most fun 6 miles I have ever run in my life!! I think I'm still chewing on mud and will probably have fun colored boogers for the next two years.

Try Try Again :)

"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work." -Thomas Alva Edison

I have this long ago created fear of needles. The idea of a sharp object penetrating my body from the outside world makes me...well...nauseous. The first experience I remember of these dreaded needles was when I was in kindergarten. I walked into this tiny, cold room, with only two chairs and a giant table. I looked up into the face of this women who seemed to be at least 10 ft tall. Her pearly white teeth were smiling back at me as if she knew something I didn't. My mom was walking with me, as if nothing were wrong. Inside I knew she must be scared too! Then, without warning, this giant women bends down and picks me up! What was she doing to me?! She set me on a chair and handed me a little dumb dumb sucker, probably poisonous, and a stuffed bear, as if that would help! I could feel tears beginning to well up in my eyes; I would not let her see me cry though. She began rubbing this cold, wet towel thing on my arm and told me to relax. She then whipped out this needle, the size of a garden hose, and smiled that evil smile again.

Next thing I remember...I was sitting under the table...screaming for her to get that thing away from me. Why I chose to be a nurse....Heaven only knows. I gave my first injection last winter semester, and it went surprisingly well; I only fainted once. Just kidding, I didn't even faint. But this week, was the much dreaded week of the MedSurg semester in nursing. IV's. I felt calm going in and throughout all the instruction. Then it came time to practice on a partner. Laura my partner stuck me first. I asked her to, so that way I would know how it felt when I stuck her. My heart was pounding out of my chest as I watched her stick a needle and a plastic tube into my vein. She did amazing! It really didn't even hurt and there was barely any blood. Then it was my turn.

I found a vein on Laura, which was not an easy task. My heart went from beating out of my chest, to not beating at all. I counted to three, and pushed the needle in. Just my luck...her vein rolls and I miss it all together. After fishing for it for a while (sorry Laura), I finally pulled out the tubing and needle and got Laura some juice because she looked like she was going to faint. I looked at my instructor and said, "Oh well. I tried, maybe next time I'll get it." Without saying a word, she sat down in the patients chair, and stuck her arm out. I think my face went as pale as Laura's. I grabbed another needle, more gauze, and tried to scrape up some lost confidence.

Longer story short. I made it into my instructors vein, but went a bit to far and infiltrated her vein, which means she'll probably have a nice bruise to show her kids back at home. She was so nice to me and was so positive and confident in me, even after I wrecked her vein. So maybe I didn't do amazing. Maybe I struggled a bit with my first IV. But when all else fails...try, try again. Right?

When Life Gives You Lemons

“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.” –Albert Einstein

A few months ago I met a women in her mid 50's living in an assisted living care facility. While talking with her, I learned she had a very severe and rare case of osteoporosis. Her condition was so severe that she could no longer walk because doctors feared that the stress of walking would break the bones in her legs. She then went on to tell me that she also had Multiple Sclerosis (MS), an autoimmune disease effecting the central nervous system in which the body's own immune system attacks it's nerves. Because of her multiple health conditions, her husband left her.

After hearing her story, I immediately began to tell her I was sorry. She stopped me, and then started to laugh! In my mind I started to think that she must be crazy too, after all I probably would be if all I could do was sit in bed. She could see my astonishment at her laughing, and she then got very serious and said, "Yes. I have a hard life. But so does everyone else. What makes me different is that every morning when I wake up, it's a miracle. I don't know if when I open my eyes I'll be able to see. I don't know if I'll be able move or if I'll be paralyzed. It's a new surprise everyday!" I was amazed. This women, who had been in bed for nearly 5 years, saw everyday as a miracle. I asked what her secret was, she pulled out a bad of chocolate covered raisins from under her pillow and winked at me.

What impressed me that day was not the fact that this women had been through so many hardships, because like she said, we all have hard lives. What impressed is that she could still smile and laugh, and be an example to someone even though she just lay in a bed surrounded by curtains, unable to move. When I left her room that day, I realized that everyone is given lemons, lots of them. But it's what we do with them, it's the lemonade we make out of them, that truly define us.